Guest Post by Scot Benton. Originally posted to his facebook page.
The 1st world is jammed with "make it or break it" moments. It's difficult however to fall completely out of contention for the big promised prize - remaining a participant in the Great American Dream. But there are times...
A cyclist's greatest fear is being hit from behind by a motorist. Staff in Emergency Rooms call bike/car accidents "human versus car." There is a very ugly term they use for cyclists getting hit from behind. They call it a "Death Warrant."
I have survived several close calls in my life - on and off the bike.... I was hit head-on by another cyclist who was riding the wrong way in a bike lane in pitch black conditions, in another crash, I went over a guard rail on my way down a descent, going slightly over 50... And then there was the time I was pitched over the handlebars by a giant speed bump in a bike lane on a federal highway, that was caused by a giant pine tree root growing under the pavement. That last mishap was the most frightening in that I saw the bump at the very last second, but I could not go around it because of a car coming up from behind at 60mph. And so, over the bump and over the handlebars I went, contorting myself in the air in order to stay to the right out of the path of the car... I managed. I am here to whine about it all. Still here, huddling every morning in my little 1st World cocoon, still privileged, albeit mentally tempered by my brushes with happenstance.
When one is "hit from behind" it raises flags amongst cyclists. Leaves people who hear about it happening wondering sitting in cubicles at career jobs they choose to ride to most of the time (and I am one of them) - wondering "should I buy a rear view mirror? Could this guy have prevented this rear-ending by having a little sliver of glass properly installed to his helmet? To his bike? Which is better?" wondering a million things, but then there is that something none of us like to address, ever - the slight terror of it all...
How does it happen that a motorist on a wide, uncrowded city street - a driver who later tells police he saw "bright flashing red lights" but somehow became confused by them - sees cyclists and runs into them anyway?
Ive had two weeks of recovering from this latest interaction, my first ever with a car, and all I can say is, I am terrified... I have avoided a billion car doors, cars passing me and abruptly turning right. You name it, it's happened - and I have come out with no more than a few scrapes and a wavering level of numbness. In spite of it all though, I have stayed and I remain, consistently positive. I stay to the right, let cars by - i recognize that drivers are out there to get places - i wave them past when I can see the lane is clear - I give the "universal thumbs up" - and I move forward...
But getting rear-ended when I was on the white line on the right side of the road, with a rechargeable rear light blasting away, this is completely a new emotion, again, slight terror.
I cant speak of the incident from direct memory, it rendered me quickly unconscious - I don't recall the minutes before nor after. I woke up in the emergency room surrounded by people in scrubs. I saw beyond the staff working on me, first my sister, my friend who had been riding behind me, and my mother. My head was swimming from the concussion and my head has continued to do so, to a lesser degree as time goes by, but even now it isn't quite right. Some of you are saying right now, "but was he ever quite right?".
Witnesses reported that our rear lights and headlights were extremely bright. My friend who was riding directly behind me was miraculously unharmed, but she found herself unable to hold back from speaking at the top of her lungs to the despondent driver who hit me - who exited his car and came to stare at me lying unconscious in a contorted position on the pavement. "To the extreme right" I was lying it is said.
Stories are supposed to be comprised of elements, even well-written personal/non fictional accounts, all I can think to say is that, even though I have a bruised neck and also a hairline fracture in a vertebrae in my neck - although I suffered massive bruising, to my back where my lower back took the right side mirror off the car, to my left calf, left knee, and to my hip - all of which are turning orange purple and blue now - in spite of all that, I am happy.
And certainly there is that shadow of helplessness, the fear of getting rear ended, but I will be back commuting and training as soon as the doctor gives me the ok. I will most likely rig up a way to ride with two taillights, and maybe some led lighting as well. But life goes on.
I wish I could make some statement against impaired drivers, against impaired people in general. But I am not certain of anything right now. I just feel very fortunate. Sometimes - hell, all the time when I am riding, 50 miles from any city, my meditative state takes me far far from the planet and I see myself as if from space as just one soul amongst billions and billions of people. That even happens to me sometimes as I ease slowly and carefully across town. I am just thankful to be here.
Thanks to my mother and the rest of my family spread out all over the planet, thanks to my best friend and to all the people who believe enough in the power of a bicycle to lay down their differences and just help - with Bicycle House. Thank you.
P.S. I should say that all of us who ride... We are ambassadors for commuting, for cycling. Any of you who know me are well aware that although I race as well as ride everywhere I go, when I am in town, I am amongst the most cautious of commuters. I trailer dogs around most of the time like to the grocery store, so I don't have to lock my bike! And I was once even a full-time bike messenger! I learned from people like Kyle Gates, Bernard Georges, and Chris Cooper, that slow and steady brings in the steady cash. So, remember folks! Be careful and realize people are watching you. Charging around town is dangerous and it makes bikers look - stupid and selfish! Ok, that last part was my rant for the day....
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